United We Blog…Divided We Blog Anyway

24 03 2009

bald_blogger

I’ve been invited to participate in a project that will either prove or disprove the power of social media – the Columbus Social Media Cafe is experimenting with the idea of having multiple bloggers write about a single topic on a given day, and I plan to be one of those bloggers. But the question now is a topic – what shall we all write about? Also, if you’re an interested social media-type in Columbus who is available next Monday night for a meeting, shoot me an email and I’ll give you all of the details if you’d like to participate.

Meanwhile, I’m pondering human nature – why do some people feel that it is perfectly acceptable to be rude to total strangers? The reason I’m asking is because I made a pit stop at a gas station today and The Baby threw a fit because I wouldn’t let her grab a package of pop-tarts off of the display. Some woman made a rude comment under her breath about how I should have just let her have it. Of course, I now have the perfect comeback, but that didn’t come to me until after I second-guessed my choices as a parent and then felt the need to defend my actions to a total stranger. So, which was more offensive – her rudeness? Or my need to explain myself?

flying-bitchslap

And, in case you’re keeping score at home, I am still looking for work, but I think it’s time to entertain my options as a freelance writer. I’ve been on a bunch of interviews and many have  managed to be both awkward and overly competitive at the same time. Rather than allow myself to get to a position where I am desperate for work, I’m ready to start being selective in terms of the projects I take on. So, if you know of anyone who is looking for a writer, please refer them to In So Many Words…, my marketing/advertising blog.

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Welcome to Naked Barbieland!

24 01 2009

cs-barbie

I’vve discovered an odd phenomenon in my house, and maybe those of you who are the parents of girls can corroborate. It seems as though any Barbie doll who crosses our threshold is destined to be nude. It doesn’t matter what costume she is wearing, how beautiful my daughter swears the doll is, and how badly she wants it, that Barbie will soon be nude. What is that about? I’ve tried begging with her (“please, honey, leave her dress on”), threatening (“if that dress comes off, so help me, that doll is going to someone who will appreciate her”), and even negotiating (“if you leave the dress on, I’ll buy Barbie her very own Dream ‘Vette”). It makes no difference. Perhaps I should consider upping the ante?

Speaking of The Baby, I had an afternoon most parents can only dream of…NOT! Hubs has been very sick with the flu this weekend, so I offered to take her with me to the grocery store so he could enjoy a little peace (Mind you, the Big Kid was up to her elbows in chores I gave her earlier as a punishment for an early morning infraction. Grrrr!). So off The Baby and I went to the grocery store. She’s been home with an ear infection since Thursday, so she was very happy to finally be out of the house. Once we got to the store, she changed modes from quiet and bored to chatty and loud. We were going down the cereal aisle when she saw a guy with a kind face, long hair, and a beard, and shouted, “HI JESUS!” At that point, I prayed that the floor would open up and swallow me. Luckily, the guy had a good sense of humor and laughed it off. The rest of the trip was uneventful, at least until it was time to check out. She had a meltdown over the candy display (in her defense, it was a huge barrel-like-container that was on her level and full of chocolate), then she was mad that she didn’t get a sticker and that Mean Mommy wasn’t going to reward her bad behavior by hunting down an unwitting cashier and get him/her to give this screaming child a sticker. Then, she really “showed” me by refusing to hold my hand in the parking lot, screaming that she didn’t want to go home, and then standing her ground in the middle of the parking lot. I hauled her howling self to the car, much to the shocked expressions of my fellow shoppers, cringing at the knowledge that at least one of them probably assumed I was some derranged kidnapper. And she wonders why she got a looooong timeout once we got home.

Seriously, between demanding 3 year olds and a sick Hubby, I’m pretty much done for the weekend! And don’t even ask about the Big Kid! That’s a whole entry in and of itself!

Oh…and in case it ever comes up in conversation, bad, bad things come up when you Google the term “naked barbie.” Just a little tip from me to you!





Hmmm…

11 09 2008

It’s been an interesting last couple of days. Where do I start?

Let’s see, work has been really good lately. The week started slowly and, with that, my sense of paranoia was in overdrive, but all is well now. Also, a couple of bursts of intuition where new business is concerned look like they may be paying off, so I’ve been mentally doing a happy dance for the past few hours.

Meanwhile, after trying to discuss a work-related idea with Hubs and being repeatedly shut down, I sadly came to the realization that Hubs will never really respect what I do for a living and I have to learn to live with that. He thinks that aspects of what my company does are evil, but he’s learning to keep his mouth shut, especially since it’s keeping a roof over our heads. Really, all I wanted, after having been starved for interaction with live humans today (my boss and my buddy were both busy with other things, so I was completely alone for hours) and then dealing with the Baby, who was quite manic (more on that in a sec), I desperately wanted to have an actual conversation with my husband that didn’t revolve around kids, politics, what’s wrong with the world today, or TV. More than anything, my feelings were hurt that he didn’t want to hear about something that’s important to me and that I find exciting.

The Baby has been a handful lately. Yes, I know she’s 3, but I’ve had a hard time with her. She’s been getting really snarky, especially toward me, and I’m not sure how to deal with it. I ask her to do something and she tells me no. I give her dinner and she throws it. Anyone have any parenting advice? I’m not a spanker and time-out’s aren’t working. What do I do now? I’m seriously getting tired of peeling spaghetti off the dining room wall!

The Big Kid’s birthday party is Saturday, so we’re frantically trying to clean the house before the in-law’s arrive. What I wouldn’t do to have a maid for the next couple of days! Looks like the menu will consist of make-your-own pizzas, snacks, crudites (veggies and dip, for those not in the loop), and cake. Very simple menu, but the kids will love it. Now, if only I can figure out what to get her as a present! She’s going to be 10, which is a strange age, as far as gift-giving is concerned. She’s too old for a lot of the toys that are out there, but not quite old enough for the electronics she wants.

Meanwhile, the diet is coming along swimmingly. I have lost 8 pounds (yay, me!) by pretty much going against all of the advice the diet gurus publish – I skip meals, I don’t work out, and I probably drink too much water. While I may have a headache occasionally from missing a meal or two, I’m starting to fit into the pants I was about to toss into the box to take to Goodwill. Again, yay me! I was bulimic at one point, so I seriously have no idea how to lose weight without involving disordered eating of some sort, so bear with me and my funky eating habits! Seriously, for the most part, I am doing pretty well – I am eating a lot more fruits and veggies than I usually do and I’m getting pretty good about eyeballing what a portion size is supposed to look like (1 ounce of cheese is about the size of a domino, a serving of meat is equal to the size of a deck of cards, use a salad plate instead of a dinner plate, and fill your plate 1/2 full of veggies and then divide the remaining half between protein and carbs), so don’t fear. I AM eating and I’ve come to the realization that I will never be a size 2 supermodel and I’m okay with it. I do want to be healthy and energetic. Basically, the goal is to be smarter, daintier, with a better wardrobe, and just plain fabulous by the time I’m 40. Dang it, I wanna be a MILF!

The garden is doing great! My herbs are flourishing, so I may have some to harvest soon. The tomatoes are going crazy, so I will soon be making roasted tomato bisque. The zucchini, broccoli, snap beans, and lettuce are growing quite nicely and are loving the cooler temperatures and rain we’ve been having, so it could be a great harvest this fall!

Finally, I have to give props to the crew at ALDI. I zoomed in there 5 minutes before closing time and did a commando-like sweep of the store in my 15 minute shopping trip. While I’m sure the crew wasn’t too thrilled to have me there right at closing time, they were still kind and gracious. So if they were thinking, “Gawd, lady! Would you leave already,” you’d never know it and I appreciate it.





Seriously, Can’t We All Just Get Along?

6 09 2008

I’m seriously astonished by the lack of tolerance in the world. Yep, I’m actually going to discuss politics today, sort of. I have been volunteering for the Obama campaign (and before you start telling me that my views are wrong, etc, let me just stop you now by saying that this in not that kind of blog, so just unclench and let me finish!) and I’m really enjoying it because of all of the people that I’m meeting.

Today, I volunteered to help register people to vote, plus we sold yard signs and buttons. An older gentleman came up to our table and started talking about Obama and how he’ll always be a n*****, started arguing his politics, etc. At this time, the Baby was in the tent with me, so I was pretty unhappy that this guy dropped the N-bomb in front of my 3 year old. At that time, I asked him not to use that kind of language in front of my daughter and he scolded me, calling me a bad mother for exposing my young daughter to a communist like Obama. At that point, I just smiled and realized that further conversation was just plain pointless, so I politely asked him if his voter registration was current and to be sure to vote his conscience in November. He looked surprised and I let him know that we would probably never agree on politics and that was okay, but I also didn’t have to listen to him using that kind of language around my child and that I would appreciate it if he would just move along. Someone else drove past our table, rolled down the window, and flipped us off. Why was that even necessary?





I’m Not Gonna Lie to Ya…

22 07 2008

I’m in hell, I truly am. I have now been smoke-free for almost 48 hours and I’m not liking it very much. Yes, it’s better for me, blah, blah, blah, but, quite frankly, I’m about ready to french kiss some random stranger who’s standing on a street corner smoking so I can suck the smoke out of their lungs. Fun, huh? I keep trying to remind myself that I did not quit smoking (sounds like I’m forbidden to smoke and that’s no good!), but that I choose not to smoke (much more empowering that way!).

Yesterday, the cravings were short, frequent, and intense. Today, there are fewer of them, but they’re longer and even more intense. Supposedly, tomorrow is the worst of it, but once I’ve made it 72 hours, all of the nicotine is out of my system and the worst is behind me. We’ll see. I’d really love to be done with smoking. It’s just not as cool as it once was, you know? People now look at smokers with disgust as they cough and wheeze. Plus, it’s expensive and smokers just aren’t the best-smelling people in the world as they flaunt their basic disregard of common sense when it comes to their health. Maybe I should become one of those self-righteous non-smokers. That would be cool! Seriously, it wouldn’t suck to succeed at something difficult and be proud of myself, right?

In other news, I’m trying to make sense of one of the interns who just did not want to do what we asked him to. He whined and made every possible excuse why he couldn’t do it, until we finally gave up and told him to forget it. I really don’t get it. When I interned, I did everything my boss asked me to because it was a connection to my field and I wanted that person to one day give me a job (he did). It’s just what you do. It’s called paying your dues, so what gives?

Not much else today, but I am trying to decide on a haircut. My hair is way too long and I can’t do anything with it. Besides, I can use what was my cigarette money for a trip to the salon and Hubs can’t give me any crap about it! Think I can also squeeze in a manicure? Think of the money I’m saving! I think I may use that same line of logic and save up for a nice Coach purse in a few months. Wish me luck on that! I deserve it! This purse and I are meant to be together!





Blech!

15 07 2008

The past couple of days have filled me with nothing but an overwhelming sense of ickiness. Hubs has decided he doesn’t like his new job after all and he’s still sick, so he’s been complaining non-stop for the past few days. So, what do I do? Make the “get your shit together” speech again? Suffer in silence and hope he straightens out? I just don’t know anymore. I’m just tired of all of the stress and drama. I want stability and happiness. I would love for him, just once, to ask about me – how was my day? How am I doing?

On an up-note, I have a new office and it’s beautiful! It’s open and airy with large windows and I have tons of room. I feel so relaxed there and I have privacy. It’s truly my little sanctuary, even though it doesn’t have a door and it’s open, rather than being completely enclosed. I think I like it better this way. Boy, am I going to be pissed if they make me move again anytime soon! I can actually create in there! My old space was so dark and depressing, so I can’t imagine going back there again! I’m still in the process of trying to figure out how I want to decorate. I’d kind of like to make it a girlie palace (feel free to send me pretty stuff!), but that might be a little too precious. Regardless, I’m planning to keep fresh flowers on my desk as often as possible. Lately, I’ve been on a magnolia kick.

Also, have you noticed how many people are sick all of a sudden? What is that about?! In honor of the hilarity of it all, here is “the Man Cold” from the British show (rarely do I find British humor truly funny, so you know this has to be good!) “Man Stroke Woman.”





Peace Out, Home Skillet!

27 06 2008

For those not from Columbus, this weekend is Comfest, which, quite frankly, is an opportunity for the hygienically-impaired to gather, smoke pot in public, and do crap they wouldn’t ordinarily do on an average weekday. Pardon my crankiness, but preparation for the festival has lead to street closures around my office, which means Hubs had to drive me to work so I wouldn’t have to deal with parking (which sucks for me because I like to be free to go whenever and wherever I want to!). I went there today for a little bit on my lunch hour and ran into more stoned people than a person should ever have to deal with in one lifetime. The food looked and smelled great, but there wasn’t anything there that I hadn’t seen before, so I wasn’t overly impressed, so I stuck with the salad that was waiting for me back at the office. I’m usually pretty open-minded, so I seriously cannot, for the life of me, explain exactly why hippies annoy the bejeezus out of me.

I’m also cranky because it’s been ungodly hot and humid and my allergies have been off the charts. Seriously, could someone please just chop off my head until this crap passes?

Work has been great – slow, but great. I worked on a campaign that we have not pitched to the client just yet, but we already know that what I have already written is EXACTLY what the client wants, which means that I got a hearty congrats from the Boss. Sucks to be me, doesn’t it? 🙂

Aside from that, not much is going on right now. I’m really glad it’s the weekend so I can finally get stuff done around the house.

Speaking of The Casa, Hubs scored big. Huge, really. He brought home a sofa and accent chair, so now, finally, we have a living room that actually matches. Like real grown-ups!

Cross your fingers! Hubs is putting out resumes and applications this weekend. I feel like our luck is finally starting to turn around, so who knows?!